The Waiting Game - For Graduates
I’ve watched my older friends don the traditional regalia, diploma in hand, smiling as they pose for photographs capturing the day they worked for after 3, 4, 5, or more years. I never imagined my own 5-year college experience would end so quickly. In the blink of an eye, 5 years expired and I can’t help looking back and thinking of the 18-year-old girl I once was, and the now 23-year-old woman I have become.
My friends, gorgeous and handsome in those photos capturing their momentous accomplishment and their own transitions also over time showed me how post-grad, although rightly celebrated, is not always what it seems.
Getting Real About Graduating
What happens after the robe and cords come off, and Monday rolls around? What about when there is no class to attend, no online Zoom to log onto, and you’ve moved away from friends and environments that have been familiar for so many years? The “normal” becomes completely new and many are forced into feeling a little lost.
Change is inevitable, but as I am now about to dawn those robes myself and take those photos, I understand that the hard part about post-grad isn’t really the change at all, more so, the waiting game.
What is the “waiting game” I’m speaking of, you’re thinking? It’s the term I’ve coined for this article to describe the waiting for the start of the next chapter after you graduate from college; something many experience.
Waiting for What?
Whether you’re waiting to graduate after finishing your classes early, waiting to find a job, waiting to start a job after graduating, waiting to pass certifications to begin your job, waiting to pass your CPA exam, etc. - there is a lot of transition. The most unique and challenging part is that everyone’s “waiting” is different, but in some way, nearly every about-to, or just graduated person goes through this.
I’m fortunate to have finished my classes a term early in March and to have been hired in my job for a September start date. (Not sure if fortunate is the right word here - a digression, but I’m starting to dislike using the words “fortunate” and “blessed” although I am, because I don’t believe luck is super relevant to getting what you work for). At “the best time of my life” as everyone keeps encouraging that it is, when I am not working, when I have no obligations, when I am supported by the safety net of being newly “post-grad” and under my parents’ roof, why does it feel like I am failing?
Post-Grad Depression, Pressure, the “Slump” is Real
I’ve always been “busy” with hobbies, activities, extracurriculars, and more that keep my life full. Like many, I aspire to new goals (almost too often) and constantly feel pulled to work toward achieving them. The big “goal” of college is to essentially, get a job, right? Some may disagree, but parents and investors in your education, (including yourself) hope to see an efficient ROI. What happens after you accomplish that? No one talks about the grief that accompanies the accomplishment. It sounds strange, but for personalities who are dedicated to chasing a mission, or seeing a project/goal through, there is a bittersweetness to reaching said goal. There is also the pressure that follows to identify a new project/goal/aspiration.
I’m writing this mainly to anyone who may be experiencing something similar. Post-grad depression is real, and something I watched many of my friends (mentioned earlier) experience. There is a great personal story by Rochaun Meadows-Fernandez about her own experience with post-grad depression that I recommend as a resource for anyone interested in the topic, or who may be feeling the post-grad slump.
Recent research suggests that millennials have the highest rates of depression and anxiety of any generation, with job concerns high on their list of worries. This article, btw, was authored in 2017. Adapt it to 2021 and multiply this pressure and concerns of finding a job today in the pandemic world.
If you believe you are experiencing post-grad depression, talk to someone and know that there are resources that exist to help you through the transition. You are not alone and your feelings are valid and normal.
Worth the Wait
In the past month, I’ve been extremely aware of the changes happening in my life, both because of graduating from college, and on a basic level, because of growing up and moving on. To end on a positive note, I’ve realized the transitions are the most advantageous.
The waiting game is one we are all forced to play and participate in at some point in our lives. I’ve had to shift my anxiousness about the changes happening to excitement, realizing the opportunities that lie ahead, that I can’t even imagine, fathom, or foresee. I have realized I’m not waiting, I am living.
There are plans for you, so whatever your “wait” is, I can assure you it will be worth it.
There are different seasons of life. Spring doesn’t happen without winter, and highs without lows, the new chapters led by transitions. Lean into them. Enjoy the uncertainty. Believe in whatever your outcome is meant to be…
Your opportune time is every day you get up and go after what you want (whether it be professional or personal).
Congratulations to all the graduates.
(All Photography by Shiloh Grace Photography)
